Wednesday, January 07, 2009
Countercolumn News Ticker: Porn industry seeks Federal Bailout
(CNT)Stung by limp sales and sagging profits, the American pornography industry has fallen on hard times, and is seeking a $5 billion injection from Uncle Sam, according to CNN. Experts say that unless the Treasury moves quickly, the entire U.S. adult entertainment industry could go down quicker than a crack whore on a quota, say anal-ysts.
Meanwhile, the nation's capital was thronged with demonstrators as the Million MILF March staged a series of protests around Washington DC. The MILF March comprised a loose interracial coalition of dwarves, amputees, teens, lolitas, matures, barely legals, daddies, daughters, Asians, latinas, lesbians, gays, cheerleaders, strippers, whores, latex queens, dominatrixes, submissives, slaves, gagged girls, sluts, bimbos, drunks, babysitters, amateurs, coeds, babes, bitches, cowgirls, midgets, MILFs, daughters, ponygirls, putas, exhibitionists, voyeurs, housewives, brides, victims, lactators, lapdancers, nurses, schoolgirls, secretaries, shemales, shorties, swingers, autoeroticists, teachers, trannies, sadists, wrestlers and wives, marching to save their jobs and to demand more respect from legislators and the population at large.
"If we're going to remain an industrial nation, we have to have some domestic porn manufacturing capacity," said Chesty Pullerhair, arguing that a failure to subsidize the American Porn industry would result in tens of thousands of porn industry jobs fleeing to Thailand, Cambodia, the Philippines, Bulgaria, Hungaria, Russia and the Ukraine "with a giant sucking sound."
Free full-length streaming downloads at 11.
Splash, out
Jason
Meanwhile, the nation's capital was thronged with demonstrators as the Million MILF March staged a series of protests around Washington DC. The MILF March comprised a loose interracial coalition of dwarves, amputees, teens, lolitas, matures, barely legals, daddies, daughters, Asians, latinas, lesbians, gays, cheerleaders, strippers, whores, latex queens, dominatrixes, submissives, slaves, gagged girls, sluts, bimbos, drunks, babysitters, amateurs, coeds, babes, bitches, cowgirls, midgets, MILFs, daughters, ponygirls, putas, exhibitionists, voyeurs, housewives, brides, victims, lactators, lapdancers, nurses, schoolgirls, secretaries, shemales, shorties, swingers, autoeroticists, teachers, trannies, sadists, wrestlers and wives, marching to save their jobs and to demand more respect from legislators and the population at large.
"If we're going to remain an industrial nation, we have to have some domestic porn manufacturing capacity," said Chesty Pullerhair, arguing that a failure to subsidize the American Porn industry would result in tens of thousands of porn industry jobs fleeing to Thailand, Cambodia, the Philippines, Bulgaria, Hungaria, Russia and the Ukraine "with a giant sucking sound."
Free full-length streaming downloads at 11.
Splash, out
Jason
Labels: Humor, News Ticker, Sex
Comments:
I would support a bailout of the porn industry over the domestic auto industry because domestic porn producers put out a much better product than the Big 3.
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# posted by 
: 9:06 PM
: 9:06 PM
