COUNTERCOLUMN: All Your Bias Are Belong to Us

Top Djimmi swings ...

When one nation pursues a nuclear weapon, the risk of nuclear attack rises for all nations.

Great! Let's recognize Iran's right to nuclear technology right away! Other Presidents would force a rival nation to all but sell their soul at the bargaining table for us simply to look the other way. The One, however, in his wisdom, has given that concession away for nothing.

And when innocents in Bosnia and Darfur are slaughtered, that is a stain on our collective conscience.

The innocents in Darfur are being slaughtered by Muslims. But don't mention that.

In Ankara, I made clear that America is not – and never will be – at war with Islam.

Never? Suppose Islam were at war with us?

We will, however, relentlessly confront violent extremists who pose a grave threat to our security.

Yes. By calling off the War on Terror and advocating immediate surrender in Iraq on the campaign trail. By directing law enforcement agencies to go hands-off radical Muslims here at home. And finally, by advocating the release of Gitmo inmates in the United States and ensuring the rest of them get lawyers.

I am aware that some question or justify the events of 9/11.

Good. Let's elevate them to our level by refusing to make a case why they're wrong.

That's why we're partnering with a coalition of forty-six countries. And despite the costs involved, America's commitment will not weaken. Indeed, none of us should tolerate these extremists. They have killed in many countries. They have killed people of different faiths – more than any other, they have killed Muslims. Their actions are irreconcilable with the rights of human beings, the progress of nations, and with Islam. The Holy Koran teaches that whoever kills an innocent, it is as if he has killed all mankind; and whoever saves a person, it is as if he has saved all mankind. The enduring faith of over a billion people is so much bigger than the narrow hatred of a few. Islam is not part of the problem in combating violent extremism – it is an important part of promoting peace.

Finally he gets something right.

Unlike Afghanistan, Iraq was a war of choice that provoked strong differences in my country and around the world.

And his stupidity in airing that out, and dissing the previous administration, as his his usual classless wont, is also a stupidity of choice. I wonder what Iraq's Gold Star mothers would think of that statement?

Although I believe that the Iraqi people are ultimately better off without the tyranny of Saddam Hussein, I also believe that events in Iraq have reminded America of the need to use diplomacy and build international consensus to resolve our problems whenever possible.

Ummm... the Iraq war came after 12 years worth of diplomacy, Mr. President. And was fought by a pretty good sized coalition itself. Further, Mr. President, since you yourself brought up the term 'consensus,' let me remind you that in 2003, there was no doubt about what the international consensus was: Saddam was in violation of the UNSC resolutions, was a state sponsor of terror, and out of compliance with the terms of the cease fire.

Clinton bombed them for a reason.

have made it clear to the Iraqi people that we pursue no bases, and no claim on their territory or resources. Iraq's sovereignty is its own. That is why I ordered the removal of our combat brigades by next August.

"Relentless pursuit!!!"

I have unequivocally prohibited the use of torture by the United States

Good. So did your predecessor. Except you reserved the right to use it in the future. Just like your predecessor. Color me unimpressed.

I have ordered the prison at Guantanamo Bay closed by early next year.

ROFLMAO

America's strong bonds with Israel are well known. This bond is unbreakable. It is based upon cultural and historical ties, and the recognition that the aspiration for a Jewish homeland is rooted in a tragic history that cannot be denied.
Around the world, the Jewish people were persecuted for centuries, and anti-Semitism in Europe culminated in an unprecedented Holocaust. Tomorrow, I will visit Buchenwald, which was part of a network of camps where Jews were enslaved, tortured, shot and gassed to death by the Third Reich. Six million Jews were killed – more than the entire Jewish population of Israel today. Denying that fact is baseless, ignorant, and hateful.

Good. More like this, please.

For decades, there has been a stalemate: two peoples with legitimate aspirations, each with a painful history that makes compromise elusive. It is easy to point fingers – for Palestinians to point to the displacement brought by Israel's founding.

News flash: Their displacement was not brought about by Israel's founding.

Palestinians must abandon violence. Resistance through violence and killing is wrong and does not succeed. For centuries, black people in America suffered the lash of the whip as slaves and the humiliation of segregation. But it was not violence that won full and equal rights. It was a peaceful and determined insistence upon the ideals at the center of America's founding. This same story can be told by people from South Africa to South Asia; from Eastern Europe to Indonesia. It's a story with a simple truth: that violence is a dead end.

Spirit of 76!

Holy crap, Mr. President! Slavery was eradicated by the American Civil War, and 600,000 dead! Where on earth do you get this nonsense?

At the same time, Israelis must acknowledge that just as Israel's right to exist cannot be denied, neither can Palestine's. The United States does not accept the legitimacy of continued Israeli settlements. This construction violates previous agreements and undermines efforts to achieve peace. It is time for these settlements to stop.

That is a huge rhetorical concession to make. What did the US get at the negotiating table in exchange for us sticking a shiv in Israel's ribs?

I'm waiting.

This history is well known. Rather than remain trapped in the past, I have made it clear to Iran's leaders and people that my country is prepared to move forward.

Move foreward? With Ahmadinejad?!?!?

In what universe does that make a lick of sense?

The only thing that will move forward is Iran's nuclear program and missile capabilities.

There will be many issues to discuss between our two countries, and we are willing to move forward without preconditions on the basis of mutual respect.

Without preconditions!?!?!?!

Even Hillary isn't that stupid.

I understand those who protest that some countries have weapons that others do not. No single nation should pick and choose which nations hold nuclear weapons. That is why I strongly reaffirmed America's commitment to seek a world in which no nations hold nuclear weapons.

Good idea. Now that the genie is out of the bottle, let's give a decisive strategic advantage to liars, terrorists and outlaw states.

Stupid fucking hippies.

I know there has been controversy about the promotion of democracy in recent years

Controversy? Promoting democracy is controversial? What kind of nihilist cesspool do you normally associate with, Mr. President? Wait. Don't answer that.

"Bear any burden," indeed.

T

hat does not lessen my commitment, however, to governments that reflect the will of the people. Each nation gives life to this principle in its own way, grounded in the traditions of its own people.

Ok, Top Djimmi. Explain to me precisely how the government of North Korea gives life to the principle that governments reflect the will of the people. Because I'm not sure you're clear on the concept.

Islam has a proud tradition of tolerance. We see it in the history of Andalusia and Cordoba during the Inquisition. I saw it firsthand as a child in Indonesia, where devout Christians worshiped freely in an overwhelmingly Muslim country.

Behold: Muslim tolerance: Indonesian style.

I've seen smarter speeches at high school graduation ceremonies.

I swear, Democrats have an incredibly childlike faith in the power of parallel construction.

Splash, out

Jason

Labels: International relations, Islam, Middle East, Obama, Religion